Getting Older

Thursday - October 14, 2010

Saturday, I took my mother to her "cousin's reunion at her home church on Crooked Creek. She is 90 and was one of the oldest (if not the oldest)who was in attendance. She knew most of the relatives there, but she said she remembered them when they were little! The majority of those there had lost their parents, which was sad when they starting talking about things from the past. This year it seemed to affect Mom just a little more.

After a wonderful time of great fellowship and food, Mom decided she wanted to go see one of her foster sisters (cousin) who is a resident of a local nursing home. Aunt Ruby is 94 and has been a resident of the facility for two year. It was so heart breaking seeing all of the residents, but especially Aunt Ruby. She acted as if she knew Mom and called me "Suzy-bell" which she would always call me when I would first go in to see her at home.

She talked nonstop mainly about things that took place in the past. Mom was affected by this. She wanted to see her "sister" as she was years ago. But alas, that was not meant to be. To hear her rattle on talking to no one in particular was so sad. Aunt Ruby, seemed to be happy as well as we could tell with where she is, even though she is living in the past. She would laugh and talk and laugh some more.

Left to right: Mom, Aunt Frankie, and Aunt Ruby

There were many patients there who were moaning and groaning, which really made me stop and thank God that Mom has the health she does, and that Aunt Ruby's state of mind did not allow her to be upset with the sounds that echoed through those hallways.

Aunt Ruby had no children and was the youngest of the Whitman Aunts. Through the years, she and her sisters would take care of a sister that may have been ailing. Aunt Keller was bed fast for over a year and possibly it was closer to ten years; Aunt Lucy had cancer; Aunt Ella had heart problems; and Aunt Frankie also had problems with her heart. They loved one another and vowed to take care of each other. But Aunt Ruby outlived all her sisters, and even though they are not here on earth taking care of her, they are watching over her. She has many visitors - nieces, nephews, and her church family.

This is a picture of Mom's foster mother and sisters - yes, there are nine foster sisters with only one who had passed away - Nancy, as a young woman. She also had a foster brother, Donald, who was killed in a mining accident. Mom talks about them all with such fond memories.

The Whitman Aunts with their mother - Granny Polly

Seated; Vivian, Granny Polly, Lillie

Standing: Aunt Frankie, Aunt Lucy, Florence, Aunt Junia, Aunt Ruby, Aunt Ella, and Aunt Keller

These ladies took care of their mother and one another. They were all instrumental in helping raise their 11th sister - Irene - my mother! We always called those who lived at the home place "Aunt", why we didn't refer to the others as Aunt - I'm not sure!! Aunt Junia was married to my Dad's oldest brother, Uncle Son - so she was an Aunt! Aunt Ruby was closer in age to Mom, so she was a companion; Aunt Keller took a lot of the responsibility for caring for Mom - she was just like a grandmother to us, and a mother to Mom. Mom loved each and every one of these ladies. They made sure she knew her "real" father and siblings, and she became as close to them as she was her "foster" family.

Mom knows how fortunate she is that she is not in a nursing home. That is not an option as long as we (my brothers and me) are able to care for her. Many question why we don't hire someone to come in and stay with her. If for no other reason, my aunts would be an example as to why we don't. We promised Dad he would not have to worry about Mom - we would be there for her. We also helped Dad to take care of his parents. Mammaw and Pappaw lived in a house behind ours. after apaw died, Mammaw fell and broke her hip. She then stayed with us, but on occasion go and visit with her other children!

Life has had a way of taking the children off in many direction with so many activities that keep them busy, busy, busy. Many times they are too busy to visit or think about the older generation. All this older generation would like is to receive a call, a card, or a visit from their loved ones. Some day we all will get older and then maybe we will understand what it means - not just the aches and pain, but the loneliness and solitude that is experienced each day.

I came across a Bible verse that may sum up to many as to why we do what we do for Mom, and why we sacrifice much of our life to help her. The main reason we do it is because we love her! But this verse makes you think!

If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
I Timothy 5:8 NIV

There are times when it isn't possible to care for the aging parents, and that is why we have the assisted living accommodations as well as the nursing home. If you and your parents have to go that route -we all understand - you don't forget them, but there are so many who are forgotten!!! Just like Mom, who wants to hear from her grandchildren, family, and friends even though one of us is always there with her this older generation loves to hear from all from her past. You might be surprised at how much she lights up when she gets a call, a visit, or a card from those she thinks has forgotten her. It wears her out when she travels a long distance - even the trip to Logan County wore her out, so it is nice when she gets visits, cards, and the phone calls!

As I get older, I pray that I will not put a burden on my family, and that I will be able to take care of myself until it is time for me to go Home!

All I Can Do Pray

Monday - October 11, 2010

All I Can Do Pray

. . . do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34 NKJ

"An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up." Proverbs 12:25 NIV

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take." Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT

Have you ever felt anxious; worried about what tomorrow might bring for you or your loved ones? Even though we as Christians know what the Bible tells us, it is a human trait we sometimes have trouble letting go! We become anxious when waiting to hear word about a loved one or close friend who may be ill; or when waiting to hear news about a business or educational decision. Our stomach churns; we become anxious; can't sleep or eat; and we pray!!

I admit – I tend to worry about family, friends, the economy, and oh so many other things. I pray daily that all will be well and trouble free. I KNOW GOD is in control. I try to knock those worries out of my mind – sometimes I can, other times I can’t. What I want may not be in God’s Plan; therefore I really need to accept that, which I do after much praying, crying, and praying some more. Many have told me that to worry is a sin! I know they mean well to try and get me not to worry. I know they pray about their concerns, but I’m sure there is that churning in the pit of their stomach wondering and praying for a resolution for those things weighing heavy on their hearts.

I do know what I need to be doing! . . . And I do it daily – actually, many times a day! I am who I am – I am and have always been a person who tries to make it right for all I love, but I know I can’t always make that possible. I will always try - many times it will not be enough - and many time I will be hurt because all I did wasn't enough. I am a "silly goose" as Bill calls me, but I will continue trying to do my best to make those around me happy, at peace, comfortable, and healthy.

All I can do is pray

Blessings as Grandparents

Friday - September 24, 2010

A day has been set aside for the nation to honor our Grandparents. I'm sure there are many grandparents who appreciate this day because that may be the only time they hear from their grandchildren! Bill and I were both fortunate in being able to be close to our grandparents - oh the memories we both have - precious memories.

Each day we feel blessed to have a gorgeous grand-daughter, Cora Ann. The distance in miles from her is not as far as it was, and we feel so blessed because we love this baby girl more than words could ever tell. I just pray that she knows how strong that love is as she gets older. We pray that she is healthy and has all that she needs. We know that she is being raised in a good Christian home and that when the time comes, she will accept Jesus Christ as her Savior. She is such a doll, and is the joy of our lives.

The following pictures are just a glimpse of the joy we see when around Cora Ann. The pure joy of being a child and enjoying life and those around you . . . that's what I hope you will see when you look at the pictures. We can hear her giggles, see her eyes twinkling, and feel her hugs when looking at the pictures we have!!!

The curiosity of the young when looking at the petals on the flowers!

The joy on her face after receiving a new toy from Granddad and Mammaw.

The thrill of bouncing on a ball.


Okay, maybe she's not thrilled at staying still for a photo shot with Granddad and Mammaw - at least we were happy! :)

Mammaw was making a noise with her tongue . . . Cora was trying to figure out how to make the same noise!!!

The biggest blue eyes that just grab our hearts! Was she sleepy - oh no - she was wanting to stay up a little longer!

Is it okay if I pet the dog??? She loved Speedy, but he was shaking like a leaf!

Apparently she stands with her hands behind her back a lot as seen in this picture . . . just like her Granddad!

Can you hear her giggle?? I can!!! She loved the musical animals at her Great-Mammaw Layne's!

The adventure she had running up and down the ramp just about gave us a heart-attack! :)

When with Cora Ann, we play again on the dusty lanes of our childhood as we return to the memories of our Grandparents. They were always bigger than life companions who helped us bridge our childhood and maturity as we entered adulthood. Our grandparents were a true blessing to us, as we hope one day we will be to you Cora Ann!

WE LOVE YOU CORA ANN!!!!!

Labor Day Memories - Pappaw and Mammaw Layne

September 6, 2010

Labor Day, the first Monday in September, is a creation of the labor movement and is dedicated to the social and economic achievements of American workers. It constitutes a yearly national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity, and well-being of our country.

Traditionally, Labor Day is celebrated by most Americans as the symbolic end of the summer. The holiday is often regarded as a day of rest and parties. Forms of celebration include picnics, barbecues, fireworks displays, water sports, and public art events. Families with school-age children take it as the last chance to travel before the end of summer recess. Similarly, some teenagers and young adults view it as the last weekend for parties before returning to school, although school starting times now vary. I guess this no longer applies as most school systems now start in August!

Dad always had Labor Day off, so we would head to Mammaw and Pappaw’s. Pappaw had the horse hooked up to the plow; Dad had stopped at the basket store and bought a bunch of bushel baskets; and Mammaw had already started cooking the noon meal. Labor Day meant we were really going to labor!

My Grandfather would go through the rows one by one, and those potatoes started turning out of the ground!! Wow! There seemed to be thousands of them! We had to let the sun dry them off a little bit, and while that happened; we placed the bushel baskets throughout the rows of potatoes. Then it was time for the four Layne kids to get to work. We picked the potatoes up and put them in the baskets. Pappaw wanted the largest potatoes picked up first. Then the smaller ones were placed in a different basket. We knew what we had to do, and we would go as fast as we could - the faster we went - the sooner the job would get completed, and then off to the hills to play we would go! :)

The only picture I could find was this one of my Uncle Pak using his pony to plow the garden. It actually looks like he is smoothing the ground before plowing the rows. I have many memories of the horses, mules, and ponies being used in the field. I would use the Gravely to plow, but not the horse!!!
Uncle Pete and Uncle Pak, Dad’s brothers, did a lot of the plowing since they were using their horse or mule. Pappaw, who was in his 80’s, still wanted to do the work. So, Dad and my uncles would “let” him do some of it. Then when we had the potatoes in the baskets, they hooked the horse up to the sleigh. Dad usually had charge of this. He would maneuver the sleigh through the garden and we would place the baskets on it and off to the crib he would go. Then we got to help carry the baskets into the crib. Pappaw would take the baskets and dump the potatoes out! The purpose was to let them dry out so he wouldn’t get any rotten ones in the batch.

The following picture is what the "boys" would do after helping Pappaw do some work . . . or on a Sunday afternoon visit. The lower part of the house was shaded by a big willow tree - the coolest place to be. Mammaw and Pappaw did bot have AC!!! Starting from the left: Uncle Pete, Dad holding Mike, Uncle Son, and Uncle Pete - all great examples of hard workers!!!!

Once all the potatoes were in the crib, we got a special treat. Dad would get us all on the sleigh and take us a ride. We were no longer tired! We were having a blast!!!! Labor Day always seemed to be hot, but the love that was floating around that garden made for good memories. We would leave the potato patch and head in to a great meal of fresh green beans, fried ‘taters, corn, fried chicken, and corn bread. Oh, and there was always some sort of homemade desert! Mammaw cooked on a wood burning stove, and oh the food was “oh so good!”

After the meal was over, the men (my brothers included) went out to the front porch to rest. ME???? Well I got to help clean up the kitchen and do the dishes!!!! The privilege of being the only daughter!

The next two pictures are of Mammaw and Pappaw when they were a little younger!! Notice the fence behind Mammaw - yes, my grandfather made the fence. There is a garden on the other side of it. It was only one of many spots where Pappaw gardened!

This is a picture of Pappaw after a long day of working in the garden. He would wear his "bibs" on those days!

Pappaw and Mammaw later on through the years. Mammaw cooked three big meals a day, and Pappaw always supplied the wood for her wood burning stove! Every evening it was chopping the wood and carrying in enough for the next day!

Mammaw and Pappaw with their seven children. All were hard workers and loved their family very much. Sadly, all who are pictured in this photo are no longer with us, but they are together in Heaven above. I miss each and everyone of them!!! Left to right: Uncle Pak (Palmer), Aunt Hammie (Thelma), Pappaw, and Mammaw in the front row; Uncle Pete (Eskow), Dad Elmer/Buck), Aunt Oma, Uncle Son (Aubry), and Aunt Dean (Faye). This was taken at one of the reunions held on Pappaw''s birthday!

I would not change those weekends for anything. We did things together as a family, and we had a great time doing them. It was hard work, but it was work we did because we loved our grandparents more than anything. We weren't forced to do the work - we did it because that's how we were raised - you help family! We may have been tired at the end of the day, but what sweet memories they are now!

A Mother's Love Never Fades - It Gets Stronger

Friday - September 3, 2010

63 years ago, there was a mother holding her first born in her arms and showering him with kisses. Today that mother gave her first born a kiss. My mother, who is 90 years old, went to visit her first born, Dink, a.k.a, William Allen Layne. She wanted to wish him a Happy Birthday - even if it was a day late! (She had minor surgery on her hand and was a little under the weather on her "baby's" birthday!!!

Whether you are a newborn, or in you 60's, your mother will always think of that first time she saw you. The love only gets stronger!!! Since Dink's stroke almost 18 months ago, she has become a little more protective of her first born. She wants him to always know how much she loves him. She loves her other children just as much, but we love to tease her and say she loves Dink more because he is the oldest. Bless his heart, Dink still has his sense of humor and says that it is true!!!

Dink did not want me to take a picture until I asked if he would allow me to take one with him and Mom together!!! He agreed and here are a couple of good shots!!!! One with his sneaky grin, and the other with Mom bending over him and giving him a kiss in the head!!! Precious moment - Precious memories!!!!!

Love you all!!!!!!!